Wednesday, 29 September 2010

I'm alive!!!

barely...Have had the worst flu for a week now :( haven't been properly ill since Jan so it hit me hard!! Least I've got it out of the way early this year yay! My little town is a bit weird today...I just popped to the post office and the butcher and everyone is sooo miserable! Even the weather is just depressing all rainy and dark, the front page of our newspaper said something about Trowbridge being a ghost town, I got all excited because I love ghosts but its actually about everyone loosing their jobs and no one has any money etc...lovely. So I am sat at my desk eating dairylea lunchables and slurping ribena (cos I instantly turn into a kid when I'm ill) and feeling really down :( if anyone wants to send me happy things that would be appreciated :D 

Thursday, 16 September 2010

Rant + Near death experience!!

Unfortunately, when me and Sam walk to work we are surrounded by school and college kids. The girls with their croyden face lifts and pink pyjamas and the boys in their white shell suits with their hands in their bloody pants!!! Just gross! It should be illegal, next time I see them I will report them to the police saying they are outside the school staring at the kids fondling their bits! Oh and the other thing, walking down the street blaring out their crap chav music! No one wants to hear that rubbish, I'm pretty sure your £30 Samsung came with a pair of headphones so bloody use them! ARGHHH and a stupid bus ran a red light this morning just as I stepped into the road, my life flashed before my eyes I swear. I hate this grotty little town, one day we will move away to a nice quiet village where we won't be surrounded by thieving, car crashing Polish people and we won't get burgled! Chav's will only be a rumour of evil in a far off world, and I can have lots of Pugs and Chickens in the garden :) heaven. If I achieve that at some point in my life I will be truly happy :). Peace out folks, remember to call the cops on those willy fiddling teenagers! :p 

Wednesday, 15 September 2010

Mid-Mid-life crisis, zombies and spiders

Good Morning all, sorry about no posts recently, I'd like to say I've been too busy but that would be a lie. The truthful reason is busy playing warcraft :P.

Yesterday was a bad day...something twigged yesterday, after being at my new job for 27 days now I've probably worked about 5 days and the rest I've had nothing to do. Sounds sweet doesn't it? Well that's what I thought but its starting to wear on me now and I am actually feeling quite depressed. I've had to stop taking holiday as I've noticed I've already taken 3 days off, and that's not good! So after spending nearly 3k on my web design course I'm deciding this may not be the right thing for me. Or it could be! I don't know I'm stuck here doing marketing things I have no clue about and the people running this business definitely have no clue about. So it's just shit really, if they knew what they wanted to do and what they wanted from me this would be a nicer job but its basically get on with it. Get on with what?!....Exactly. So feeling frustrated and down and basically want to get out, but I'm going to stick it for 6 months at least I guess I owe them that much. 

Sooo last night. I woke up at 3am by the sensation of something on my could have been a hair, it could have been the duvet but in my heart of hearts I knew it was an effing gurt spider. I was up in a shot frantically brushing my face off, then went to the toilet to pee...I swear I felt a spider web on my face...So I got back into bed after searching with the dim light from my phone for giant, black, many-legged, beasts of evil, no away with it Mr Spider...this time. After that I had what can only be described as a freaking epic zombie dream. Basically, I think I was going to catch a train/plane (some sort of transport) and everyone was moving through these big glass tubes, like a covered shopping centre. We all saw the air outside turn misty and the people outside started to turn into the blood spewing zombies from 28 days/weeks later. So then the running commenced. The tubes were like a maze and we kept running from these zombies, until we thought we were safe...the glass above us started to crack and this misty air got in turning more people to zombies, so we ran and ran some more. I actually remember thinking in my dream "if this was a movie these actors would have to be bloody fit" haha! It was quite a long dream so in a nutshell, me and some other survivors decided to fight back. We ventured outside when we could see the mist had gone and calculated a cunning plan to kill these zombies. We snuck up on them but they escaped, the ambush site was a big house with a swimming pool so we all got in the pool...dunno why, seems the last thing you would want to do with zombies about. We all started to talk about the people who we left behind etc and then I woke up! There was an amphibious car in there somewhere but I have no idea where haha can you tell I'm a gamer?

Hope that made for an interesting if weird read, I'm going back to making stuff up to do...but at least I have a Stephen King audio book to listen to today so shouldn't go to insane ciao! 

Friday, 10 September 2010

I had a nightmare....

O.O...I never have nightmares (even though all I read is horror books and all I watch is horror films :P), but I had a cracker last night. So I was in town with Sam (bf) and we were all happy hugging, holding hands etc, we kissed goodbye and he went to work and I went off to do some shopping. For some reason next thing I know I'm in the multi-storey car park and it is full with all the people I went to school with and people that used to be my friends but aren't any more. I'm stood in the centre of this massive group of people and they are all saying the most horrible things to me, basically all the things I hate about myself but coming from them. I try to argue back but it's like they can't hear me, they told me that Sam hates me and post's twitter updates about it all the time and then one boy who was in my class Matthew Bonser said "urgh I though you would have changed your face by now" so I said in tears "I didn't think there was anything wrong with my face" so I pushed past them all and ran nearly all the way home crying. When I was nearly home I checked my twitter and saw Sam had put something on there under the category "my girlfriend is a bitch" (don't even think Twitter has categories but did in my dream lol). So I couldn't go home as there would be no comfort there and I never felt so alone then I woke up...

And that horrible feeling has stayed with me all morning! Really wasn't a nice dream :(. On a better note my puppy seems to be doing much better, even sometimes putting a bit of weight on his bad leg which is excellent so proud of him :). Back to the vets for a check-up tomorrow and here's some pics of him looking sorry for himself. 



Wednesday, 8 September 2010

Today is the day..

Took Hogan in for his Surgery consultation today, and turns out he's having it done today!!! Panic! If you haven't bothered to read back in my blogs (and I don't blame you) my pug has hip dysplasia and has to have some form of surgery. 

So we went over to Devizes this morning and saw a lovely Surgeon called Ian, he told us there were 3 options : hip replacement, pin the joint together or remove the top of his leg bone. The first 2 would cost us a lovely sum of £4000!!! So we went for number 3 as he said it would be fine for a dog his size and is a lot cheaper! So left my baby and now home trying to get more time of work to look after him. Will receive a call from Ian at around 3pm so will update then unless I've chewed my fingers off by then :p


My puppy is fine all went well :) the surgeon even said that he didn't thing it was dysplasia so we won't have an issue with the right one in future! Good stuff! My poor little guy is just sleeping it off we will be leaving to get him in 20 mins, have missed him sooo much!! 

Sunday, 5 September 2010

Chicken and Rage

Evening everyone, hope you all had a great weekend! Mine was uneventful as always so didn't really have anything to update with really, so I'll just bore you with my usual drivel.

I had a sketchy dream last night though. I was stood outside my grans old house and someone stabbed me! So as I led bleeding in the road I called 999, and the cheeky bloke on the other end of the phone asked if it was something I could fix myself haha I was like um no...dying here! The weird thing is, is that I don't remember who stabbed me, one moment I was fine and the next moment I had a hole in my side haha. So the ambulance came and took me to the hospital, where no one seemed to care that I was bleeding everywhere and dying, had to ask loads of times for some pain relied...bloody NHS these days :p.

I should probably get someone to tell me what my dreams mean, it probably means that I'm deeply disturbed or insane..or both :D.

So I just spent basically my whole day making an amazing roast (not like it was appreciated)which was really nice :) but now I've looked at the time and realised that Sunday is nearly over :( and I really don't want to go to work tomorrow. If things don't look up in 6 months there will be a lot of change...

Friday, 3 September 2010

size 6 here I come...

So after failing at numerous diets, including slimming world, no bread diet etc I'm going back to the one that works. Paul Mckenna's I can make you thin. I did this "diet" a few years back and the pounds just melted off, but I basically stopped it due to laziness I think, so back on it!! It's really fun to do you just need to follow the 4 rules:

1. When you are hungry, eat
2. Eat what you want, not what you think you should
3. Eat consciously, and enjoy every mouthful
4. When you think you are full, stop eating

Simple eh? It is but it's easy to fall off the wagon, so I'm going to try it for the next 3 weeks and carry on with Curves for the next 3 weeks and I won't weigh myself til my last Curves session, and hopefully at least 7lbs will have vanished :) wish me luck!  

Wednesday, 1 September 2010


Feel like this today....

I just don't understand!!! I always used to be soo skinny and a few years back I did indeed balloon to look like the above. But I worked really hard and got down to 8st 6, but I still wanted to be I wish I was that weight again. I am now 9st 6 and I have no idea why :(. I'm eating healthier than I have in years, I'm doing more exercise than I ever have but I'm just not loosing the weight. So I though ah, its because I'm putting on muscle but no! Weighed in at curves last week lost quarter of inch of arms, thighs and waist but body fat went up 2%, I mean what the frick! 

Actually getting really down about this, just feel fat and frumpy no matter what I'm wearing, and the only thing I can think of to do is just to stop eating! And I won't because that slows down your metabolism and has the opposite effect *sigh*. This is freaking bull shit, I wish I had a device that fits on like a glove, then you pass it over your body and it kind of sluices away excess fat. Would leave a nasty mess on the floor but you would look stunning!! Would make me a rich person as well...

Only thing I can think of to do now (other than trying to invent the above) is to go cold turkey with the junk food....that's right no more takeaways, coke, crisps, chocolate - or anything tasty until I have finished my 6 weeks at Curves. If I haven't lost half a stone and literal inches in the next 3 weeks I will just jump off a bridge. Pray for me. 

Serious note today

I fully intended to come into work and tell you all about my strange dream but it completely left my head when I saw this..

This has to be the worst thing I have ever seen. These poor young puppies being thrown into the river by a girl that can only be described as sadistic, they are crying for their mother and she carries on throwing them...All I can think of is how they must feel when they hit that water, my heart is actually hurting.

They haven't found this bitch yet but when they do there will not be a severe enough punishment for her, its scary how many of these disgusting acts on animals are coming to the surface since the cat in bin fiasco. I urge you all if you see anything like this please report it to the RSPCA or the Police. I'm disgusted that there are people like this out there and that are the same species as me.

If you have a puppy please give him/her a big cuddle and a kiss, they are lucky to have someone like you :)